Every startup in JD Vance's VC fund, ranked from least to most hillbilly elegiac
What can we learn about Donald Trump's VP pick from his VC fund's investment portfolio?
Greetings, and welcome to another edition of BLOOD IN THE MACHINE, a newsletter about big tech, AI, labor, and power. This newsletter is free to read, so please sign up below (thank you!), but it’s made possible by those of you who pay to subscribe (thank you even more!). It means a great deal, and makes the continuation of this work possible. Thank you. Onwards, and keep those hammers at the ready.
When Donald Trump finally announced his pick for running mate, the reaction was somewhat muted—of course he’d pick J.D. Vance, the man on his VP shortlist most like Trump himself. That is, an effective practitioner of blustery grievance politics, a decent intuiter of the way the winds are blowing, a product of liberal media fascination, and a man all too happy to endlessly contort his positions and statements in service of elevating his own profile.
The reaction was muted everywhere outside of Silicon Valley, I should say, because Elon Musk and the loudest VCs in town were *ecstatic*. One of their own, a stone’s throw away from running the nation—intoxicating. Still, most of the media commentary so far has focused on Vance’s mega-bestselling and highly opportunistic memoir, Hillbilly Elegy, his initial lambastings of the man he now serves, and his sharp turn towards nationalism as an aspiring politician and now-senator of Ohio. That leaves one stone less turned: His stint as the founder and operator of a Cincinnati-based VC fund.
It’s reasonably well known that after Yale, Vance was taken under the wing of Peter Thiel, and spent two years at his VC firm Mithril Capital. Yet Vance launched his own VC firm, Narya—there is a rule in Silicon Valley that anyone who takes money from Thiel must use a Tolkien name generator to christen their company—back in 2020, and was funded to the tune of $93 million by Thiel, Google’s Eric Schmidt and other Valley heavyweights. Naturally, I was curious to see what kind of startup bets were placed by a man who, in the event of a Trump victory in November, would be the nation’s first tech VC vice present.
Narya lists just two employees, both of whose names appear to be generated by ChatGPT: Colin Greenspon and Falon Donohue. The fund has eleven companies in its portfolio, and they range from straightforward biotech stuff to the Don Bongino screed delivery system Rumble to outfits that seems precisely like the kind of Hillbilly Elegy of Startups it seems Vance wanted to nurture at Narya.
You can tell a man by his venture capital investment portfolio, as the ancient saying goes. So here’s a rundown of all 11 companies Vance backed at Narya, in order of how much they suit his unwieldy image as ‘whisperer of the downtrodden working class/venture capitalist who learned his tech and politics from Peter Thiel’. Would Vance embrace the company on the campaign trail? Would it embarrass him, or Trump? Would anything? Let’s find out.
“Gene Therapy. Redefined.”
A biotech company developing gene therapies named after the Sanskrit word for “action.” No such company would appear in the pages of a Vance memoir, I can tell you that.
“Defining the next generation of space security.”
Certainly among the wilder companies Vance’s fund has invested in—space security!—it’s helmed by Even Rogers, one of the contributing authors to the founding doctrinal document for Space Force, and former Palantir folks. Last spring, the company was selected for a $30 million contract from—you’ll never guess who—Space Force, for a “Tactically Responsive Space Mission.” Feel like someone might want to look into this company.
“AmplifyBio is a concept to commercial CRO dedicated to providing expert services for drug discovery, characterization, optimization, in vitro and in vivo safety studies, and manufacturing for a broad range of drug modalities, including small molecule, cell and gene therapies, mRNA, and other biologics.”
A company that facilitates clinical drug trials, I think. Another startup distressingly void of caricatured American working class bona fides.
“We equip governments and financial institutions with the tools for accurate, fair and equitable property valuations… Our Automated Valuation Models (AVMs) bring a new standard of accuracy to property taxation.”
Little speaks to the heart of the common man in 2024 like an automated system for assessing property taxes. I would also be simply shocked if it turned out that such an automated system incorporated any sort of biases into its conclusions as to which homes in which neighborhoods were worth more than others.
“Our mission is to maximize value for our clients by leading companies to focus on excellence.”
An asset management firm that is “unapologetically committed to shareholder primacy” and actually says in its mission statement that it aims to reward companies that ignore other stakeholders besides shareholders, and think too many companies these days are thinking about “anyone potentially affected by a corporation’s actions.”
Points for the open and brazen embrace of the robber baron ethos, and this is clearly a lightly veiled effort to declare “we are against companies that do things like DEI and pledge to be environmentally friendly,” which might be red meat for Vance’s fans, but ultimately not a lot here for his hillbillies.
[UPDATE: It has come to our attention that the founder of STRIVE is none other than erstwhile presidential hopeful and Vance pal VIVEK RAMASWAMY. Just incredible stuff here. Thanks to James Rosen-Birch for the tip.]
“The better way to get covered.”
Insurance company with an app that promises low rates. Seems pretty basic, though it’s not very clear how it plans on being cheaper than the major players with massive market share, other than “lose most of the advertising.” That might make insurance cheaper in the short term, but uh don’t you need new customers? Like to drive down costs and help cover the risk, too? Regardless, a 17-second survey of the startup’s website reveals nothing *overtly* onerous about this, and insurance salesmanship is as American as apple pie, so this gets higher marks.
“Understand, choose, and use your Medicare.”
A digital service that helps seniors navigate Medicare! Of all the startups on the list, this one seems to have the most potential for actually being good and useful, if it is not snake oil, and one that a savvy politician might want to proudly embrace backing. Unless, that is, you have publicly called for the dismantling of Medicare, and you might not want to remind voters of that.
“Farmland. Investing. Simplified… Diversify with a tangible alternative asset that has created wealth opportunities for generations.”
This is the good stuff. A web platform that lets vulture capitalists buy up parts of farmland and trade them on the commodities market, introducing a cavalcade of risk into a sector—agriculture and food production—that I think we all can agree can use more instability. I for one look forward to shorting an Iowa wheat farmer’s cropland.
Still, this is Vance’s bread and butter; even though he would himself last no longer than eight minutes outdoors doing actual farm labor, The Farmer as a metaphorical abstraction is vital to Vance’s mythology, given that his personal history spans Applachia and Ohio. An easy 7 out of 10 hillbilly eulogists.
“Combining technology and manufacturing to create a world where the world of atoms can move at the speed of bits.”
Probably “AI-powered” logistics software for manufacturing. Still not sure what this one does, and I am still turning the phrase “create a world where the world of atoms can move at the speed of bits” over in my head in delight. But manufacturing plus AI is on brand for Vance, if this company actually does anything, it is probably right up his alley.
“We create technologies that are immune to cancel culture.”
Now things are really getting Vancey up in here. The “anti-censorship” YouTube that is almost certain to fold as soon as the VC cash spigot gets turned off is home to the infrequently viewed video polemics of Glenn Greenwald, Donald Trump Jr., and Dinesh D’Souza, and Don Bongino. It’s all about “free speech” it’s raison d’etre is to stick it to big tech, and its programming is supposedly in service of the burdened working people of America (but is in reality is more likely consumed by incensed car dealership owners and rightwing trolls). And yet it’s still not quite enough to take the top slot.
“Find God’s Peace. In Prayer.”
“Join Mark Wahlberg and Jonathan Roumie on Hallow, the #1 prayer app.”
This is it. I think no company in Narya’s investment portfolio better exemplifies Vance’s mix of faux populism, performative religiosity, and VC-minded tech adventuring than an app that offers users the opportunity to pray virtually with D-list celebrities for $69.99 a year (or $9.99 a month).
"Prayer is the best way to prepare to meet the Lord when He comes. Try the Hallow App." -an actual testimonial on the website’s homepage.
And that about wraps us up. Stay frosty out there, and see you next week. General Ludd salutes us all.
Thanks for the valuable overview of his find investments, you can tell a lot about a man by the companies he funds.
I actually went to college (Notre Dame) with the guys who made the "Hallow" app and seeing it get that big is... really something.